As I sit here on this Wednesday night with a mud mask on my face I am a) trying not to move my face too much and b) thinking a bit about a conversation had today. My friend is in town from out West and we met up for a catch-up. And while we sipped on some of the most potent coffees we’d had in a while, we talked about our love lives.
He had re-connected with someone recently, who showed an interest in seeing him sometime and then poof! Stopped responding once he set up a date. Either she had something else come up, or perhaps she suddenly became stuck underneath something heavy and could not reach a telephone. But it’s a common occurrence for those of us in the (dating) field. The R.M.I.A. : the romantic missing in action.
It happens now and then to all of us. I think. (Well, that’s at least how I take comfort in it.) Conversation begins, goes well, a time and place is suggested for a meeting spot and then Poof! They’re gone. It’s like we’ve suddenly asked the wrong question. We picked the wrong door number or something. And the truth is, as my friend and I agreed upon today, is that this person simply lost interest. It became work. They met someone else. Whatever. It’s always something.
So… why not just be honest and admit to that? Why is that some people think not returning calls or text messages is the more grown up way to behave? In the words of Charlie Brown… good grief.
Sure, there are certain times where honesty is NOT the better policy. Like the time you finally sleep with cute guy you’ve been seeing and the sex lasts 30 seconds? Not the time to be honest. Nope. Smile and sigh. Smile. And. Sigh.
But as often as I have rolled my eyes at the “I need to break this off to focus on my music” or “I’m taking a break from dating” (um, you just asked me out for a coffee… but okay. whatever.) As often as I have heard that, I sort of appreciate the effort made to come up with something. It all goes back to just not being that into me, I get it! But why is it so hard for us to just say that… why do we make it sound like dating person X requires copious amounts of work and study. I’m not a mid-term for crying out loud.
I guess we can blame that first person to opt out of a date due to their need to wash their hair. Though perhaps they had some sort of freakish scalp issue… (shrugs)